Changing the Price Without Notice
May 19th, 2005 by JJ
My lady and I ordered take-out last night for dinner. We have this huge pile of menus from local restaurants that deliver. As we scanned through the pile for something that sounded appetizing, my lady noticed this odd slogan on the bottom of a Chinese restaurant menu:
“Changing The Price Without Notice.” So strange. It’s like they’re proudly proclaiming that they will change the price at any time. Also notice the poor grammar on the statement about credit cards, “We accept major credit card.”
I’d love to see a TV commercial for this place. There would be a chinese cook chopping vegetables in the restaurant kitchen. The camera pans over to the hostess, dressed up all fancy. She says, “Looks delicious! I wonder if that’s five dollar or twenty dollar? You’ll have to come to Jojo to find out! We accept major credit card.”
We did not order from this place… but what if we had?
My lady: Hi, I’d like to place an order for take out.
Restaurant: We change prices, just want you know that.
My lady: Okay. Can I have the General Tso’s Chicken?
Restaurant: Anything else?
My lady: No thanks, that’s it.
Restaurant: Twenty dollar. Be there thirty minutes.
My lady: Wait a minute. Twenty dollars? The menu says it’s eight fifty.
Restaurant: No, twenty five dollar. We change price without notice.
My lady: Now it’s twenty five dollars?
Restaurant: You want cheaper? Call tomorrow and it might be five dollar.
My lady: Uhhh…
Restaurant: We change price without notice. By the time it gets to your apartment, it could be fifty dollar.
My lady: No thanks, please cancel my order. *click*
Listen, I’m not trying to be unnecessarily critical, but I do have some advice. If you own a business and you are going to create a menu, or a sign, or an advertisement, please take a minute to focus on grammar. And if you have trouble with English, then you may want to consider asking for help. You could pay a local college kid like twenty bucks to sit with you for half an hour and proofread. This kind of thing just frustrates me. They’re shooting themselves in the foot.
RSS
That post cost twenty dollar.
Uh-oh inflation. Now it 70 dollar.
Oh no, Business bad. Back down to five dollar.
At least they don’t change your order without notice. That’d be a damned nightmare.
“Hunan Shrimp! $8.50!”
But I ordered Egg Foo Yung.
“We changed your order. And the price. $15.00!”
But… I’m allergic to shrimp!
“$15.75!”
Those crooked Asians! The poor Engrish bothers me too. College kids will work for rice bowls anyday.
i have literally had that happen. order the food, get the total over the phone. make out the check, when they get there i am told it is a higher amount. there excuse…”we raised our prices tonight”
uhm, ok.
This is a bit off tack, but you just reminded me of this story.
We got so fed up with our delivery service one night because they delivered the wrong pizza on purpose. My mate has a phobia of sweetcorn. He can’t look at it without wanting to run. The pizza place knows this, so whenever we ordered a pizza they would put sweetcorn on it for a laugh. By this point he was really fed up and wanted revenge.
We phoned them to ask for a replacment and they were really arsey on the phone. So while we were waiting we ate the wrong pizza (which they asked for back). Why did they ask for it back anyway. Were they really going to re-heat it and give it to someone else?
When the delivery guy came my friend, who can do the most perfect Cartman impression that you have ever heard, answered the door and proceeded to talk to him with Cartman’s voice. When the delivery boy asked for the pizza back my friend replyed “Screw you guy, I ate the damn pizza”. When the guy protested some more my mate asked him if he wanted to play ‘Rochambo’ (not sure how you spell it). Not very keen on this idea he walked away with jeers of “I’ll kick you squa in the nuts”.
Still not content, my mate phoned up the pizza place and placed a huge order and got it delivered to his ex girlfriends house. Then he was satisfied.
Needless to say they won’t deliver here now. THANKS MATE
See, TS, we have these things called Lawyers who take care of the Pizza Jockeys who descriminate and harass like that.
Ev, yeah, inflation’s a bitch.
Maine, then I’d have to throw down.
Totally, Thao. Offer free food and pretty much any college kid would gladly help out.
That’s just flat out wrong, Opaco. I’d probably pay the total they gave over the phone and leave it at that.
TS, that’s horrible. I’m all about quality customer service. Those pizza dudes sound like assholes. They deserve a Rochambeau.
People from England are the greatest thing ever. Number one, what the hell is a sweetcorn? Number two, I want to be called arsey every day of my life. Somebody should be put in charge of this.
I love it when guys say “my lady.” In my head, I hear Will Farrell as Robert Goulet saying it.
But I’m just weird that way.
I’ll get things started for you, Maine. You’re arsey.
LJ, I actually sort of got that from The Big Lebowski. The Dude says, “She’s not my special lady, she’s my fucking lady friend.” In my case, Momo is definitely “my special lady.”
Maine;
You are being arsey today. There. I said it. And while we’re at it, let me explain that sweetcorn is definitely different from starchycorn, creamed corn, corn on the cob, corn soup, corn chowder, corn fritters, corn bread, corn as seen on American Idol, or pesky corns residing next to painfull bunions (neither of which should be sauteed, served next to anything Spanish including refried beans, or swapped at a trading card meet).
Sweetcorn happens when corn is a hybrid seed grown for quick consumation of the plant sexual act between golden, bushy, tassles of cornsilk and the male stamen (Yeah, yeah. We know what they’re REALLY talking about!!). It grows up quickly like many urban kids and is picked when it is young and sweet - before the kernels start to dimple with age and the sugars in the corn are converted to starches.
This also explains why old ladies like this babe have wrinkles and drapey body parts.
Great job J - a voice from the eggcrate in your youth garage band days.
Queenie
Sweet.
I’m just relieved to see i’m not the only one with a phobia of sweetcorn… And just for you, Maine, sweetcorn is a small and oddly shaped vegetable… Corn on the cob style stuff… Eww… I seriously have shivers even thinking about the stuff… x