My brother is a genius.

Recently, he stopped by Steak ‘n Shake with my niece so he could buy her a milkshake. Nice, right? So, that’s all they needed - just a milkshake. He pulled up to the drive-thru, placed the order, then drove around to pick it up.

Apparently, making a milkshake isn’t easy, because it took several minutes. I assume they make them with real ice cream and whatnot. While they were waiting, my brother noticed a sign that was posted on the drive-thru window. It said, “Ketchup and Salt Available Upon Request.”

When the guy brought their order to the window, my brother did what any intelligent human being would do after noticing that sign - he asked for some ketchup and salt. And the Steak ‘n Shake worker dude did the right thing. He stuffed a bunch of ketchup and salt packets in a little bag and handed it to my brother. Mission accomplished.

After telling me this story, my brother decided that next time he’s running low on ketchup and salt in his condiment drawer at work, he’s going to make a run over to Steak ‘n Shake and ask for some without purchasing anything. Even if they don’t give it to him, it would be worth it just to see their reaction.

He and I envisioned the conversation would go something like this:

*Brother pulls up to the menu board/speaker thingy with cars ahead of him*
Worker: “Would you like to try our Deluxe Cheddar ‘n Bacon Steakburger combo?”
Brother: “No.”
Worker: “Okay. May I take your order?”
Brother: “Uh… I just need some ketchup and salt.”
Worker: “What else would you like?”
Brother: “Just the ketchup and salt please… Oh, okay… Um, the cars are moving now. I’ll pull around to the pick up window.”
*pulls up to the window*
Worker: “I’m sorry sir, I didn’t catch your order.”
Brother: “Just ketchup and salt, please”
Worker: “You don’t want to order anything else?”
Brother: “No thank you.”
Worker: “But… One second… Let me get the manager.”
Manager: “May I help you, Sir?”
Brother: “Yes. I’d like some ketchup and salt please.”
Manager: “And you don’t want to order anything else?”
Brother: “That’s right. I noticed your sign there. It says ketchup and salt available upon request.”
Manager: “Yeah, I guess it does.”
Brother: “So, I’m requesting some ketchup and salt.”
Manager: “Makes sense to me.”
*hands over the ketchup and salt*
Brother: “Thank you. And please thank the people at Steak ‘n Shake’s corporate office for having such a generous ketchup and salt policy.”

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