Round Three: Baking Brownies

August 3rd, 2005 by JJ

I’m not sure if this will last another week, but let’s give it a shot.

It’s a master list of euphemisms for shitting.

Here’s how it works. I started the list with five classics. Our loyal readers then added to the list in the comments section. The list is now compiled and it’s your turn again.

Here’s what we’ve got so far:

  1. Drop the kids off at the pool
  2. Grow a tail
  3. Open up a can of soup
  4. Pinch one off
  5. Take the Browns to the Superbowl
  6. Backing the bus out of the garage
  7. Taking Bill Cosby’s kids to the lake
  8. Make a donation to the porcelin god
  9. Dropping science
  10. Visiting fonzie’s office
  11. Lay down some spicy brown
  12. Lose a few pounds
  13. Taking a signal 92
  14. Cleaning out the vertical file
  15. Buring some cable
  16. Guile’s Taco Bell experience
  17. Blasting a dookie
  18. Rolling a ciger
  19. Squeezing out a flesh slurpee
  20. Dispensing some Soft-Serve
  21. Dropping a bomb
  22. Pinching a loaf
  23. Waking Winnie the Pooh
  24. Leaving a floater
  25. I’m going to go sit down
  26. CODE 3
  27. Chevron moment
  28. Read a book
  29. Get rid of some lunch
  30. Releasing the chocolate hostages
  31. Go number two
  32. Turtle head pokin out
  33. Gotta take a squirter
  34. Crackin’ off a couple of bricks
  35. Contributing to nature
  36. Prairie doggin’
  37. Charm an upside down brown snake
  38. The brown is down
  39. Lucy placing a charlie brown kick
  40. Molesting my asshole

Update 8/29: Let’s go! Round four.

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22 Responses to “Round Three: Baking Brownies”

  1. on 03 Aug 2005   mooalex

    Visit the library

  2. on 03 Aug 2005   JJ

    Baking brownies
    Got the Hershey squirts

  3. on 03 Aug 2005   turboslut

    ‘Visiting the crapper’ or ‘i’m going to have a crap’

    Honestly, sometimes the British language disgusts me ;)

  4. on 03 Aug 2005   Jimmy

    gotta go lose a few pounds.

  5. on 03 Aug 2005   Jimmy

    oops. that was number 12. but i use that phrase the most.

  6. on 03 Aug 2005   cousineddie

    Yeah. I’m just fresh out of phrases here.

  7. on 03 Aug 2005   Code Brown

    Code Brown
    Giving Birth — as close as us men get

    That’s all I have.

  8. on 03 Aug 2005   C Ro

    Looks like I’m the only one doing the kid’s words…

    Shee-Shee
    Shoo-Shoo

  9. on 03 Aug 2005   Code Brown

    Oops, a few more:

    Drop a duce
    Cleanse the colon
    Let the corn out

  10. on 03 Aug 2005   Code Brown

    I guess there are the variations depending on food poisioning:

    piss out my ass (always a fav)

    who knew I liked poop so much. Also, I really have to shit right now.

  11. on 03 Aug 2005   Code Brown

    Pushing my clenching limits to the max to see if i can force out some good ones. Here are a few others:

    - Put my thoughts down on paper (classic!)
    - Slide one out
    - Put my knuckles to the ground (or is that more of a stance in public restrooms?)
    - Bio Break (weak! someone just said this one in an unrelated conversation)
    - Make some room

    Let’s see if any other clairty comes to me under the want to put my thoughts down on paper.

  12. on 03 Aug 2005   C Ro

    My cousin says he has to take his “AM BM.”

    I find this foul in the extreme because I’m a delicate flower.

  13. on 03 Aug 2005   JJ

    C’mon people - Code Brown is putting us all to shame.

    Keep ‘em coming!

  14. on 03 Aug 2005   Code Brown

    so, I finally was able to take care of business. Here is what I thought of as some more common ones:

    - check the pipes
    - visit fortress of solitude
    - go to the thinking room
    - stretch the anus

    Here are ones that don’t mean anything outside my inner circle (damn, I guess i do talk about poop a lot):

    - fertilize the ferns
    - see a man about a horse
    - I have to go upstairs and check __ (my ebay auction, my stocks, the churning, etc)
    - secret activity #1
    - pay homage to burger king

    Alright, I am done. time to eat some lunch and prep tomorrow’s delivery.

    – Code Brown (old school friend of ulysses from b-town)

  15. on 03 Aug 2005   JJ

    Hmmm… code….. lots of hints:

    Ulysses - B-Town - Living in CA (IP address) - Probably using a Mac - Definitely using Firefox

    Ulysses is a big hint. that goes waaaay back. Anyone who knows me as Ulysses is golden. *Thinking*

    I’m going to have to hire Columbo to sort this one out.

  16. on 03 Aug 2005   heather

    taking a seat on the throne?

  17. on 03 Aug 2005   Code Brown

    Hell yea!

    Columbo would have this shit sorted out by now. I think I hear him and his Fiat driving up right now..

    Also, I think I missed a key one that would upset the D:

    - make a cleveland steamer

    Code Brown (who does use a Mac for it’s tasty BSD center)

  18. on 03 Aug 2005   JJ

    Okay. Code Brown e-mailed me his true identity. I couldn’t figure it out on my own. I’m a brainless twat.

    For the rest of you:
    Thank you for helping. Keep that shit coming! Literally.

  19. on 04 Aug 2005   turboslut

    Another British classic, “I’m going for a dump”. Of course I have never used such foul sayings. I am very prim and proper, lol :)

  20. on 04 Aug 2005   J.Mo

    Put my thoughts down on paper. Shit, I love it.

    Who is this mysterious Code Brown? And Macs are overrated. Sorry, Code Brown.

  21. on 04 Aug 2005   Code Brown

    It’s all about the right tool for the job. I spend my days in office and in unix. cuts my dev cycles a bit having both in one machine. plus it’s pretty ( that may be what you are calling overrated ).

    Back to my shit..

  22. on 08 Aug 2005   JJ

    “Who is this mysterious Code Brown?”

    Aww forget it.. just call him Bobby.

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