Open Up and Say Arrrggghh!!!
Aug. 24, 2005 by Jason
Ev sent me this picture that reminds me of the time I got a wisdom tooth pulled by a pirate:
It was a couple of years ago. I had an impacted wisdom tooth. My appointment to have that bitch yanked was October 31st. I had no idea the dentist would be in costume.
He was wearing a pirate outfit, and his assistant was dressed as a vampire. Fucking ridiculous. I was about to get the happy gas and have a part of my body crushed and removed, and the guy who was responsible for my safety looked like Captain Hook.
I don’t want you to think that I’m blaming the costume, but the guy fucked up. I lost the feeling in a small section of my bottom lip. I surfed around a bit to find out what might have happened.
A lot of websites say it’s possible for the dentist to accidentally damage a nerve in your mouth. But those sites also say the feeling eventually comes back within a couple of months at the longest.
Some of the feeling did return eventually, but I still have that weird tingly feeling in my lip, kind of like when you hit your funny bone. I bite it at least once a week while eating. Like I’ll bite into a big sandwich and my half-numb lip gets in the way. Awful. Simply awful. I hate it.
Is it too late to sue? It’s been nearly two years.
(Shit - this somewhat funny story turned into a little personal drama. Ugh!)

August 24th, 2005
What’s more terrifiying?
1. ) Your dentist saying, “You need to floss more, boy! Yargh!”?
or
2.) Seeing a vampire standing over you as you slowly drift off to sleep, tied up in harnesses in her chair?
August 24th, 2005
So it wasn’t enought just to feel sorry for your little mohawk, now I feel sorry for your lip. You’re killin me, JJ!
August 24th, 2005
Wisdom teeth are great. As long as they fit in your mouth. Everyone has some weird story that involves a pirate, treasure, or near death.
My dentist was gunning for my wisdom teeth from the first day I saw him. Every time he would ask when I wanted them ripped out. Luckly, all mine had busted through long ago and were not impacted. My mouth contained them properly so i was in no rush to get out.
One visit, he noticed that a small cavity formed on one. He saw his opportunity and I agreed to get them pulled. He secretly just wanted to add them to his collection.
I didn’t know that laughing gas seriously freaks me out until this visit. they gave me a good dosage and i felt a numb.. but when things started going black is when i freaked out. So the nice lady took off the gas and i sat for a bit. The doc numbed me up and started digging around.
So I thought he was on tooth number 2 when he was on tooth 4. When he was pulling it out of my mouth, it slipped and fell into my throat. A quick neck snapping move later and I was shooting it projectile style onto his assistant who gased me up. He didn’t seem to think to much of this to me but told my wife that it was pretty scary to him.
I was happy to hear that they were brought out whole. The dentist, his assistant, the receptionist, and I played a quick game of holdem and I won. I got to keep my teeth.
http://ozog.org/images/teeth.jpg
6 months later and the holes still feel fresh. Ugh.
August 24th, 2005
Maine:
The floss thing… definitely!
Sar:
I know - I’m pitiful.
JO:
“when things started going black is when i freaked out”
That’s insane. The gas rules and the drip is even better. Heavenly. And that picture of bone and flesh is disgusting.
August 24th, 2005
I’ve had the drip for other things.. the twilight stuff is good. It’s fun in recovery. The gas just did bad things to my head.
Anyways, I stuck those suckers under my pillow expecting that the tooth lady would slip a 100 under there for my trouble. I woke up the next morning and only found my box of monster teeth.
Bitch, where’s my money!?
August 24th, 2005
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0095348/quotes
My bitch better have my money. / through rain, sleet or snow. / My whore better have my money, / not half, not some, but all my cash. / ‘Cause if she don’t, / I’m gonna put my foot in her ass.
August 24th, 2005
that’s kind of scary. i dressed up as a pirate and went to work at halloween, but i work at a toy store, so that’s not as scary.
August 25th, 2005
I would have asked Captain Morgan for some rum.
August 25th, 2005
HA! I just watched that movie the other day.. can I get just one spare rib? Classic!
August 25th, 2005
Heather:
Working in a toy store! That’s every little kid’s dream. You’re livin’ the dream!
Marc:
Aye, matey.
JO:
Yes!!! That’s the best scene. “How ’bout you just pour some in my hand for a nickel.” Then he pulls out a roll of 20’s. Hilarious!
June 23rd, 2006
its a about 1 in 1000 chance of that happening. I guess the tooth was one of the bottom ones. Well he may have brused a nerve in your jaw. Its quite common for it to tingle for up to about 6 months but anything after you really need to see your dentist. You will have had to sign something that says you understand the risks.
June 23rd, 2006
Della:
Yeah, I’m sure I signed something like that. 1 in 1000? I guess I just got lucky.