Don’t you hate those days when you feel ugly, old, and fat? Here are a few things I do to help pick me up on days like those.

1. Walk down Mt. Pleasant Road. In general, men have no shame when it comes to women, but Latin men are, by far, the winners, especially when it comes to catcalling. Feeling ugly? Walk around my neigborhood and you’ll get a “hola mamasita, que bonita” ego-boost every five seconds, assuming you can get past the groups of creepy men ogling your breasts.

2. Go to a clothing store and try on clothes the next size up. It’s a quick way to convince yourself that you really did lose those 10 pounds!
3. Attend an exercise class with overweight middle-aged disgruntled housewifes. This will surely make you feel pretty, young, and happy to be single.
4. Check out your cute ex-boyfriends on myspace or friendster. “That’s right, I’m the shit, I hooked up with THAT guy. ”
5. Lean your stand-up mirror at an angle against the wall and marvel at your small hips and big tits.
6. Hang out at the Capitol Hill cafeteria. Yes, believe the stereotype that men working on the Hill are really not that attractive. Working in the beltway compensates for things, um, below the belt. The Washingtonienne used this to her advantage and so could you.
7. Go on a date with someone who’s really into you and you’re not that into. Take advantage of someone who’s willing to take you out in hopes of getting laid by someone as sexy as you.
8. Hang out at the Florida Greyhound race tracks. Plenty of old men will buy you drinks, give you betting tips, and make you feel like a beauty. In fact, hanging out with old men in general will make you feel great.
9. Get drunk. A 2 at 10 is a 10 at 2. Even when it comes to you. I must admit, there are countless times when I’ve looked at myself in the mirror while wasted and said, “Damn, J.mo, you look good. You are the shit.” Then truth reveals itself the next morning when you pull out your digital camera. “Uhh, no, J.mo, you were not THE shit, but rather looked LIKE shit.” So, my advice, just stay drunk.
10. Spend time with my friend Paul. People do not compliment enough in this world and Paul makes up for those that never seem to say nice things. What’s better than hearing how sexy you are from someone you respect? It rocks, Paul rocks, and so do you! Believe it.

Now, take your beautiful, smart, sexy self and get out there and compliment. And while you’re at it, let me know what you do to boost your ego.