The Churning
19Oct/0579

Making Butt Coffee: Final Round of Shit Euphemisms

Like a giant turd being squeezed out, the Shit List just keeps growing.

For any new readers:
This is a master list of euphemisms for shitting. I started with five classics. The Churning Loyalists then added to the list in the comments section. Wash. Rinse. Repeat. The list is now compiled and it's your turn again.

Here's what we've got so far:

  1. A floating crap game
  2. AM BM
  3. Backing the bus out of the garage
  4. Bajsa
  5. Baking brownies
  6. Bio Break
  7. Blasting a dookie
  8. Building a log cabin
  9. Building a poo cabin
  10. Burying some cable
  11. Bust out a Nug Nug
  12. Butt cobras
  13. Butt gherkin
  14. Charm an upside down brown snake
  15. Check my messages
  16. Check the pipes
  17. Cleaning out the vertical file
  18. Cleanse the colon
  19. Clear out some inventory
  20. Code 3
  21. Code Brown
  22. Colon bowlin’
  23. Contemplate my existence
  24. Contributing to nature
  25. Crackin’ off a couple of bricks
  26. Crowning
  27. Curl one down
  28. Cut a cable
  29. Dispensing some Soft-Serve
  30. Download
  31. Drop a deuce
  32. Drop the kids off at the pool
  33. Drop wolf bait
  34. Droppin a load
  35. Dropping a bomb
  36. Dropping science
  37. Exorcise the demons
  38. Faça exame de uma merda
  39. Feed the water gods
  40. Fertilize the ferns
  41. Get rid of some lunch
  42. Give birth to a brown baby Marine
  43. Giving Birth
  44. Go number two
  45. Go phone Elvis
  46. Go to the thinking room
  47. Go upstairs and check __
  48. Going for a dump
  49. Got the Hershey squirts
  50. Gotta take a squirter
  51. Grow a tail
  52. Have a crap
  53. Have some alone time
  54. Heave a Havana
  55. I gotta heave ho
  56. I’m going to go sit down
  57. Jumpers in the door
  58. Lägga en korv
  59. Lay down some spicy brown
  60. Lay some pipe
  61. Leaving a floater
  62. Let the corn out
  63. Lose a few pounds
  64. Lucy placing a charlie brown kick
  65. Make a Cleveland steamer
  66. Make a donation to the porcelin god
  67. Make some butt coffee
  68. Make some room
  69. Molesting my asshole
  70. My band’s about to have an ep release
  71. My poop is playing peek-a-boo
  72. Nehmen Sie eine Scheiße
  73. Numero dos
  74. Open up a can of soup
  75. Open wide for chunky
  76. Park my breakfast
  77. Pay homage to burger king
  78. Pay the band
  79. Pinch one off
  80. Pinchin' a stink pickle
  81. Pinching a loaf
  82. Piss out my ass
  83. Prairie doggin’
  84. Prenda una merda
  85. Prenez une merde
  86. Press a coil
  87. Push some putty
  88. Put my knuckles to the ground
  89. Put my thoughts down on paper
  90. Putting in my two weeks notice
  91. Read a book
  92. Red light flashing
  93. Release the beasts
  94. Releasing the chocolate hostages
  95. Rob the bakery
  96. Roll some logs
  97. Rolling a cigar
  98. Say goodbye to Mr. Brown
  99. Secret activity #1
  100. See a man about a horse
  101. Send a fax
  102. Serving up a poo poo platter
  103. Shee-Shee
  104. Shoo-Shoo
  105. Shoot some craps
  106. Skita
  107. Slide one out
  108. Squash out a fun log
  109. Squash out a yule log
  110. Squeeze out a Lincoln
  111. Squeezing out a flesh slurpee
  112. Stretch the anus
  113. Ta en rövare
  114. Take a seat on the throne
  115. Take the Browns to the Superbowl
  116. Take the kids for a swim
  117. Taking a signal 92
  118. Taking Bill Cosby’s kids to the lake
  119. The brown is down
  120. The three S’s
  121. Throw a wild deuce in the pot
  122. Throwing a curve ball
  123. Tome una mierda
  124. Turtle head pokin out
  125. Turtlin’ it
  126. Visit fortress of solitude
  127. Visit the library
  128. Visit the throne
  129. Visiting fonzie’s office
  130. Visiting the Brown Mound of Rebound
  131. Visiting the crapper
  132. Waking Winnie the Pooh
  133. Watch the Jamaican bobsled team

Add to the list by leaving comments. I'll include your suggestions on the list.

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Comments (79) Trackbacks (4)
  1. Redecorate the bathroom

    Peel the paint

    Spraypaint the toilet

  2. As we say in Kentucky…

    “The green-apple quicksteps.”

  3. Poop is rad. And so is Chad.

  4. beam down a shatner

  5. “the brown dog scratching at the cotton fence”

  6. How bout:
    Bust out/squeeze out a fat one
    Droppin the nuggets into the deep fryer
    Unload the paypacket

  7. Brownhawk Down!

  8. How about:

    * Solving the natural logarithm for food.
    * Here I sit, cheeks a flexin’ givin’ birth to another Texan.
    * Giving birth to a food baby.
    * Coprogenesis.
    * Making fossil fuel for the future.
    * Launching a stink rocket.
    * Launching the brown torpedo.
    * Laying one off.
    * Eliminating evidence.
    * Dunking the host in the wine.
    * Having Communion with Nature.
    * Duncan Hines (Dunkin’ Hinds).
    * Contaminating the water.
    * Heaving a Hershey.
    * Uncorking the bunghole.
    * Dropping chocolate buoys.
    * Firing your food.
    * Making a deposit at the porcelain bank.
    * Unko shimasu. (to crap) Unko shitteimasu (to be crapping) Unko suru chuu desu (in the middle of crapping).
    * Unclogging the pipes.
    * Detonating the dirty bomb.
    * Divorcing your dinner.
    * Coiling the cobra.

  9. “im touchin cotton”

  10. Blow some mud

    Unclog the Hershey highway

  11. Let Obama inspect the pool.

  12. My dad used to say,”I gotta go stinky” whenever he had to poop. I hate that term, it sounds too descriptive. I prefer something more clinical.

  13. Taking the Browns to the Superbowl

    Growing a monkey tail

  14. Pinch a loaf

  15. solve a natural log-arithm…ha ha love it BANZ111

  16. solve a natural log-arithm…ha ha love it BANZ111

  17. Dropping a deuce from my caboose.

  18. Some of these are idiotic.

  19. Giving birth to the Cosby kids

  20. I Don’t have a words to say.

  21. I got a Bronc in the Chute…. and he is shoulderin` the gate.
    Drop the Obama`s off at the White House.
    Take a Pelosi and wipe my Biden.

  22. the three S’s are shit shave and shower.

  23. drop some grocery nuggets in the deep fryer

  24. go christen the Organic Titanic

  25. full moon over troubled waters

  26. Knitting a brown sweater

  27. too soon?

    attempt a top kill
    perform a junk shot

    All BP needed to do was attach a toilet to that busted line and i would have taken care of it for them a month ago.


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