Stalker or Not: Part 2
Jan. 13, 2006 by J.Mo
I must admit, when it comes to hooking up, the early part of 2005 was out of control. I was all about one-night stands. I’m past that now. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.
Here’s one of my many, um, fucked up experiences from last year:
Sun PM: I went out to a local bar to have a few drinks with friends. After a couple of drinks, I decided that this boy (Ben) I was talking to was cute enough to take home with me. So I asked him, he agreed, we had some fun.
From here on out it’s all voice mail messages:
Mon PM: I went to a movie with a friend. Phone off. After the movie, I turned on my phone. Message from Ben, the boy from Sunday night. “Hey, J.mo, I know this might sound weird, but I lost the key to my house and need a place to stay tonight….blah, blah, blah.”
(Dude, if you want to hook up with me again, just say so, don’t make up an excuse. And if it’s not an excuse, don’t you have other friends to stay with?!?)
Tue AM: I call Ben back mid-day saying that I hoped he found a place to stay the night before.
Wed AM: He calls me, “Hey J.mo, I’m in the city if you want to hang out. Call me if you want to hang out.”
Wed PM1: “Hey J.mo, it’s Ben. I called you earlier. Let’s hang out. I can hop on the 78 bus and be at your house in ten minutes.”
(WTF? He knows my bus number?)
Wed PM2: “Hey J.mo, it’s Ben again. I left you a messsage hoping to hanging out with you tonight, but maybe you’re avoiding my calls.”
Thu AM: “Hey J.mo, it’s Ben again. What’s up? Let’s hang out tonight, I’ll be in your neighborhood. I had a great time with you on Sunday night. Let’s have fun again.”
Thu PM: “Hey Ben, sorry I missed your calls. I can’t hang out tonight I have plans.”
Thu PM: “Hey J.mo, let’s hang out!!! I can hop on the bus!”
Fri PM: “Hey J.mo, what’s up? I’m in the city. Let’s hang out tonight.”
Fri PM2: “Hey J.mo, what are you doing tonight? Call me back!”
Fri PM3: “Hey J.mo, what’s going on tonight? Why aren’t you returning my calls? Let’s hang out. I’m in town with my friend, Carl. We want to hang out. Apt 506!”
(At this point, I was a little freaked out. He remembered my apt number!! Shit. I told the security guard downstairs to not let anyone in to the building to see me unless I buzzed them in. I turned off my phone.)
Friday PM4: “Hey! Carl and I are hanging out and we want to come over and have some FUN!!!”
(Uh…What makes him think I’m willing to have a threesome with him?)
Friday PM5: Hang up.
Friday PM6: Hang up.
Friday PM7: “Hey J.mo! Where are you? Answer your phone! Carl and I want to have some fun tonight!!!! We want to come over!!!”
Sat AM: I woke up, listened to seven messages he left for me on Friday night. Holy shit.
Sat AM: “Hey Ben. I received your messages last night, all SEVEN of your messages and well, I had a great time with you on Sunday night, but don’t call me ever again.”
I told a friend of mine about him soon thereafter, and well, she had a similar experience with him! I didn’t include all his voice mail messages in this posting, but honestly, no exaggeration, I think he called me about 15 times in 6 days. So, on a scale of 1 to 10…
January 13th, 2006
On the stalker scale, I’d give Ben a 6.
Dude’s obviously all horned-up, but not necessarily a stalker. I’d give him a much higher stalker rating if you had never returned his calls.
“I call Ben back mid-day saying that I hoped he found a place to stay the night before.”
“Hey Ben, sorry I missed your calls. I can’t hang out tonight I have plans.”
He probably hoped you were still interested. I know you were just trying to be nice, but a lot of guys don’t understand nice - especially guys that are all horned-up and hopeful.
January 13th, 2006
Funniest thing happened. For some reason, I though this was posted by JJ.
Bare with me.
First hint: … I decided that this boy (Ben) I was talking…
My reaction: nobody calls dude a boy?
Second hint: … was cute enough to take home with me…
My reaction: WTF?
Third hint: …So I asked him, he agreed, we had some fun…
My reaction: I quit reading and immediately went to shower and washed myself - twice.
I learned this was a post by J.Mo after showering.
Moral of the story: check whose post you reading before jump into any conclusions.
I told you it was funny.
January 13th, 2006
Hahaha…
Okay J.Mo - After thinking this over a bit, I’d say seven messages in one night increases this guy’s stalker rating to a 7. That’s pretty insane.
January 13th, 2006
Well, I’m sure I’ll piss J.Mo off by saying this, but I don’t give him a stalker rating, really.
I mean, if I HAD to, I’d say a 5 or 6, because of the bus thing and the apartment thing.
Also? The Carl thing.
J.mo, you know I love you, but sometimes you are really hard on people. I mean, you know the world is packed full of losers who get rejected and don’t ever quite get over it, right?
January 13th, 2006
About a 6…
I’m thinking because he thought he scored so easily the first night that it would be the same exact way there after. I’m kinda with JJ, in that if you had never returned his calls, I’d give him a higher score.
The bus and apartment thing is a little creepy, but I’m betting when he was calling then he probably had a few drinks in him. I’m also thinking that later when he called a bazillion times on Friday night that he had even more dirnks in him and was just calling over and over again in desperation because he was “all horned up”.
January 13th, 2006
Oh yeah, and I’m sure he had told his buddy ‘Carl’ all about Sunday night and Carl was egging him on to call over and over again too…
January 13th, 2006
JJ: When I’m not interested in someone, I prefer to tell them face-to-face (or on the phone is that’s not an option) rather than not calling back. It’s what I would expect from others too. I think 7 times in one night is more than excessive. By the way, I did run into Ben again and he ‘briefly’ became obsessed with me again. And chose to ignore me on the phone when I said I was not interested in him. And he said that he called me all those times before because he was trying to ‘prove a point’ about me not returning all his calls. Yeah, riiiigghhtt….. I’d agree with you though. 7, borderline 8, easily reaching 10, if given an opportunity.
RockyJay: Now, THAT is funny.
Ev: I’m pissed at you and never want to see you again in my entire life. I didn’t know you had such a fragile ego. Just kidding. So, I’m a bitch.
Mojotek: Good points. Yeah, I’m the queen of drunk-dialing, but 7! times in a span of 6 hours???
January 13th, 2006
Yeah, I remember you telling me about that guy. You were kinda freaked out a little when he started calling you weeks after the fact.
I understand not wanting to hurt someone’s feelings on a voicemail. But I’d say the first voicemail you left him, after he called saying he needed a place to crash for the night, could’ve gone something like this:
“Ben, sorry I missed your call. I hope you found a place to crash. It’s probably for the best anyway. Sunday was just a one time thing for me. Hope you understand. Take care.”
Of course at that point you had no idea he was going to keep calling you. Hindsight’s 20 20 and all that.
January 13th, 2006
Oh, J.Mo, you can’t blame Ben or any other stalker boys. It’s just that you’re just a beguiling Devil Woman.
January 13th, 2006
JJ: Actually, that was another guy. Because of my experience with Ben the Stalker, I asked your advice about whether I should call and tell someone I wasn’t interested in them or just ignore him. I took your advice and never called him back. Then, a few weeks later, he called me (twice). I decided to call him and tell him I wasn’t interested. He said he appreciated my honesty and thanked me for calling him back.
CRo: Hahah. I was just telling P3 the “Appliance Man calling me a Devil Woman” story yesterday. Appliance Man, for those that don’t know is this guy I hooked up during my one-night stand phase. Besides telling me that he would “make out with me, but not go all the way” and turning on lots of appliances, lights, and water faucets before leaving my apt in the morning, he called me a a devil woman before getting into the elevator. P3 replied to my story, “It’s no wonder you think I’m a nice guy. The guys you’ve met in the past are fucking freaks.” Freaks attrack freaks, I suppose.
January 13th, 2006
Dear J.Mo,
Suck a fuck.
Sincerely,
Ev
P.S. Ha ha ha you eat dongs for a living! Immaturity rulz!
January 13th, 2006
Sheez, I tell ya, give a guy a little puss, and see what he turns into. And men complain about women getting all attached and shit.
I’d give him an 8 on the stalker scale!!
January 13th, 2006
Eating dongs is the best thing ever. Suck a fuck, Ev.
April, no kidding. Puss makes men crazy, especially mine.
February 1st, 2006
jmo- these boys on the churning are missing something here. a 5 or 6? and not that stelker-like?
wtf?
this guy’s a freak… who calls that many times in a few days. i cn’t believe you called him back even to tell him you don’t want to talk to him ever again…
and now i’m dying to know what does ev and jj qualify as a true stalker? someone that hides in the bushes and taps your calls?
wtf?