The Best Way to Die
Feb. 27, 2006 by Jason
- An old buddy of mine used to tell me he knew how he would die. He’d get shot in the back by a jealous husband while running naked down the street. Doesn’t seem like such a great way to go, but he figured he could at least say he lived life on the edge - with passion.
- Momo and I watched the documentary Grizzly Man last night. It’s about a guy who loved bears way too much. He was obsessed. Eventually he took his obsession too far. A pissed off grizzly got tired of his shit and chewed him up. The guy’s friends seem convinced that’s the way he wanted to go out.
- Don Knotts died Friday. Dude was a legend among comic actors. He checked out after “pulmonary and respiratory complications.”
Death sucks. Most people don’t look forward to it, but it’s inevitable. So if it’s gotta happen, then what’s the best way to go? Would you rather be shot in the back, eaten by a bear, or die from disease at 81?
Or maybe you’ve got a more creative idea…
February 27th, 2006
Not very creative, but chemically it might be :p
I want to die the way I almost did once - full of drugs in a hospital bed. The world just fades away and you’re tired of fighting. I was 31 and the cancer almost beat me. Strange what a powerful thing quality of life can be….especially when it’s not there anymore.
February 27th, 2006
If I’ve lived a full life and I’m old, then I just wanna go in my sleep. But if it’s supposed to happen while I’m still young, then I’d like it to be while I was saving little kids from a burning building. Ya know… so I’d get a statue and shit.
February 27th, 2006
I’d hate to be shot in the back, because then I’d have to haunt some guy for 30 years. That’s not exactly resting in peace.
I can’t say I’d like to get eaten by a bear, because that would mean I was doing something stupid enough to put myself in a position where bears can eat me. I really don’t think I’d want my last thought to be, “Jeez - why did I have to explore this cave in the early spring?” or “Who covers their body in honey and runs through a forest? Who?”
I’d go with the Don Knotts special.
February 27th, 2006
I used to plan out the best ways to die when I was younger…
Yea, strange hobby. But I always hoped to die skydiving naked without a parachute.
I figure, if everyone has to die, why not make it exciting?
February 27th, 2006
If I were gonna die, I would want to die after smoking a huge joint, drinking a 5th of jack, smoking a pack of cigs, eating a pizza, and fucking the shit out of my wife.
I’m goin’ out in style, bitches.
February 27th, 2006
i’m with mojotek on this one.
February 27th, 2006
Grizzly Man was an awesome doc.
Pity it didn’t get nominated for an Oscar.
But who gives a shit abt them anyway?
February 27th, 2006
One of my fav. authors (Octavia Butler) died this weekend as well. She fell in her backyard and hit her head. She was only 58.
I think I’d like to go suddenly like that and given my propensity for falling, I just may.
February 27th, 2006
I think my Mom did it best. She went for a visit to the neighbor’s house, came home in a good mood, went to bed, and didn’t wake up.
February 27th, 2006
One of my students once told me that the best way to die is holding a package of chocolate, a bag of marshmallows, and some graham crackers, and then jumping into a fire. This way people would think you died happy makng s’mores.
I never said my students were sane.
February 27th, 2006
I recorded that movie on my computer with the tv card- I’m going to put together a little video display. I imagine it’s going to take me a couple weeks or longer to get around to it and fixed the way I want but if I didn’t have plans to look forward to accomplishing I might eat a shitload of mushrooms and leave my body so far behind traveling astral planes it would die. What was the question again?
February 27th, 2006
OD’ding on drugs– havent decided which one yet…im thinking either heroin or cocaine, although E would sure be a good one too..
Of course, the death and the ‘dangers of drugs’ would need to surely be made into an afterschool special to really have the full effect. Someone would need to ‘learn’ from my demise. I guess in that vein, I my answer would be the Grizzly Man death– because I learned from that movie that its really really REALLY not a good idea to live among bears.
February 27th, 2006
I’ve given this a lot of thought and I think I’m with JuicyA on this one. My friends and I used to say that if we lived past 70, we’d start up a crazy acid habit. And that wouldn’t kill us, but it would be funny as fuck. Then we’d take up something a little more dangerous like coke.
At that age, that type of lifestyle would eventually kill you - and while you waited for the final curtain call, you’d be a serious hit at family get-togethers.
February 28th, 2006
I think that freezing to death would be nice. I’ve heard that it’s almost sublime (well, forgetting the fact you’re freezing your fucking balls off) and it feels like you’re just drifting off to sleep.
Then I read Ev’s comment. Yeah man. I think of that movie, the one where the guy dies boinking his wife. That’d be the best way man. Have one last orgasm and boom, heart attack. Yeah. Thanks babe, and oh yeah, bye
March 13th, 2006
I always thought it would be nice to strap C4 to my chest and walk into a big building, give them 24 hours notice (as to not intentionally hurt anyone) and kablooie. Something about the huge useless destruction enticed me. No philosophical or political statement, just large scale blowing up shit. But lately I think that if I have any choice in the matter, i.e. not getting hit by a train, I think when my firmities start to really give way I just wanna crawl into some god-forsaken canyon and let the wilderness have its way with me.
I think that would be nice.
But isn’t all this talk just really a projection of how we might want to live our lives?
July 1st, 2006
I am someone who will be dying soon, even thought his thread might not even be alive no more it still helps me let people know that I don’t know that I will be dead in a week or so. That might not make sence with all of the “that” and stuff in there but still. I am 17 and I have messed my life up more then you can imagine, theonly way I think I can get out of this is to just go with it and kill myself, I know this is weird but it is something that I will be doing very very soon. July 11th to be exact. The way I will be doing it is like this: I will be seeing the one I Love the most first I will be saying I Love You and let her know what is going on, it will hurt her more then anything and she will try to stop me. I will not let her stop me cause I promised myself I would do this without hesitation. I will then walk to the closest highway (401) Yes I am in canada…I will slice my throat open wide, I will let the blood hit then cement down below hitting as many car’s as possible, I will pull my blade to my heart and stab my way to it. I will then drop, I will try to smile and say I Love You as loud as I can.(Won’t be loud at all) Then let my life go without a fight.
That may be the weirdest thing you have ever read but by the time you read it, it may have been done.
Thanks,
Kevin Ley
October 11th, 2006
the best way to die is to jump in a very tall building… while falling you’ll remember everything and you’ll gonna tel yourself did i live to the fullest… and then you’ll start to cry and ask your self, why did it end this way…
guys, i’m very sad… i believe i will never see the sunrise again… I still don’t know what I’m going to do but one thing is for sure… it will happen d way it should be… i will not tel my mom nor my dad not even my girlfriend and my bestfriend. goodbye guys. love yourself ok. don’t let anybody dictate your life because you’ll never be happy in the end. October 11, 2006 …. 1:03PM
January 4th, 2007
Well I think this is the best way to die. First get a good life insurance to take care of families left behind. Then get about 20 gas containers with full gas in your car with about 5 boxes of fireplace logs (the type that is easy to ignite and burns for hours). Buy yourself few bottles of sleeping pills, coke soda and candle with lighter. With all this drive somewhere remote without telling anyone.
Once you drive few hours in one direction (neighboring state), for the last time fill your car with full tank gas, drive to a middle of a field with nothing around you. Position the gas tanks and the fire log throughout the car and light the candle and place it between fire logs on top of one gas container, then take all the sleeping pile you have with coke soda (this will help it take effect quickly). You will be dead sleep in few seconds or a minute or two.
If set right in about 15 – 30min the car should be engulf with fire (very intense fire). There will be nothing of you or the car left, you won’t bother anyone for funeral service.
That is how I am hoping to be able to do it soon.
April 19th, 2008
After reading everybody’s contribution i feel that i am not alone… i am dying soon as well…. i have been waiting for this moment… not as if i want it… but i noe it coming…
I’ve no home, no family, no friends, no money…. even my love hates me…. y should i not die?
i should die… but i am still chosing the best way…
most probably i will die of hunger, die of cold, die of thrust… or even committing suicide…
i use to love someone so deep…. but i screwed up the relationship and i screw up my home my family…. i have no one… no one…
if kevin ley u r dead… den R I P….
i think u r just hurt like me …. maybe i will be doing something like this…. but probably no one will noe it…
Good Bye if you do read this threat…
i am gone…
Alan Chen Chee Yaoo…… Good bye Jaime Good bye gareth…