How Old am I?
March 30th, 2006 by JJ
I fell off my skateboard again last night. And this time I wasn’t even drunk.
I was just a block from my apartment in Center City Philly on a busy main road. As I mentioned before, the Philly sidewalks aren’t conducive to skateboarding, so I ride in the street like the “real” skaters do.
So I was hauling ass in the street, approaching a stoplight at a busy downtown intersection. There were people all over the place, heading home from work, eating at outdoor cafes, standing on the street corner waiting to cross. As I approached the light, I skidded my shoe on the blacktop to slow down. I was almost completely stopped, so I stood straight up and put my right foot on the street to stop completely.
Problem is - my foot landed on some asphalt gravel and slipped. Imagine running down the road toward an area covered with marbles then jumping right on top of them. That’s what it felt like.
My feet shot right out from under me and I collapsed on my side. Luckily the board didn’t shoot out into traffic; It just kind of rolled into the curb.
There was a dude about a foot away from me waiting to cross the street. He had a fucking front row seat.
Like last time, I shouted as I fell. It was sort of an involuntary shriek of fear as I felt the pavement hit my ass. I yelled, “FUCK!”
In that split second, I thought “What a stupid thing to yell. Couldn’t you think of something funny to say, JJ?”
I stood up, brushed myself off and grabbed my board. I made eye contact with the dude that just watched me bust my ass. He didn’t even try to look away. He just kind of laughed under his breath.
As I walked away in embarrassment I was thinking, “There’s got to be a way to make a joke out of this. There’s got to be something funny I could say.”
So in a completely sarcastic tone I said, “That was cool.” I’m such a dork.
Now — there’s an epilogue to this little story.
I told this story to a buddy at work and another guy overheard a bit of it and walked up to us. He looked right at me and asked, “How old are you?”
Good point.
RSS
Hahaha! Actually that’s kind of funny. I probably would have said something smartass like that too… ‘cept I never could really skateboard, so it wouldn’t have been nearly as cool.
I have had moments like that when you just wish you had something witty to say. Your pride was probably more bruised than your arse.
Don’t ya hate that? I hate being 30 something, I really do, esp when someone reminds me of it.
Hee, hee - that guy was pretty nice - I would’ve had a really surprised look for 2 seconds before pointing at you and laughing!
Thanks for the laugh. Good thing that board didn’t roll out into traffic. Kevin would have been upset. So.. how is your side?
Mojotek:
Obviously I can’t really ride one either…
Turboslut:
True. I try so hard to look cool, then I ruin it in one quick moment.
Ron:
I’m still not used to it!
Shirley:
Of course you would have.
Julie:
I know! I failed to mention that I basically stole that skateboard from my nephew. I’m clumsy and cruel.
My side hurts pretty bad actually. Either I pulled a muscle or bruised a rib. Either way it sucks.
I feel your pain. I fall down all over the place and usually don’t even have a good reason like a skateboard or gravel, not even the drink. AND I’m older than you.
I’m so used to it by now though, so I own it.
After I fall, I get up and do the gymnastics-dismount pose. You know, like this but not as graceful.
Actually… I was just giving you crap. I don’t think Kevin really cares. Sucks that you hurt yourself. Careful next time.
That was a damn good laugh after a damn long day at work.
A good laugh for me. Not for you.
C.Ro:
That would have been soooo funny if I did the dismount pose. I wish I had thought of that.
Julie:
Crap is good. Keep it coming.
Kev:
Keep laughing, giggle-boy.
“C.Ro:
That would have been soooo funny if I did the dismount pose. I wish I had thought of that.”
There’s always next time.
Im taking out my BMX this weekend…but now Im worried that Ill look like an old person when i fall on my head. Oh well, Ill be sure to blog about it.
I’m 40 and love me some loud rock n roll. Sheez, i’ve been listening to it since my teens. Am I supposed to stop now just because my age hit some kind of “old number” on the counter?
But I’ve actually had people I work with ask me: “Aren’t you a little old to be listening to that?”
F’ers.
Coolbeans:
I’ll be ready.
JuicyA:
As long as we get some entertainment out of it, then it’s worth it.
Trouble:
You’re never too old to rock - unless you start saying, “music was so much better back in my day.” If that happens, then you’re too old.
Actually, I’m a child of the 80s, so I rarely say music was better in my day…with one exception. I went to see Black Flag in 1986, and that show kicked ass. But there’s so much good music out there these days…thank god for cheap mp3 downloads.