The Wifebeater and a Rapid Fire Guido Fist Pump
May 1st, 2006 by JJ
This guy is a friend of a friend of a friend. Check out how he described himself on MySpace:
There are some things in this world you can’t stop or contain such as my pimp hand, the guido fist pump, the iroc-z, the wifebeater, multiple gold chains, the italian horn, the italian flag, 18″ subs, house music, the duece, and B.K.I.M. The sooner you “know” this the better off you will be, but seriously don’t make me take a combo to your head…
Just some examples if you will. Just once I took my way strong pimp hand into a rapid fire guido fist pump and I could seriously see sweat glistening off peoples foreheads but that wasn’t enough. Why stop there? I took the guido fist pump to the 3rd degree and girls were overheating and passing out. Bringing anything else to the table such as the wifebeater or god-forbid the iroc -z could have turned this move so powerful it would have tested the boundries of the universe and tempted to almost tear the fabric of reality itself.
For a newbie it’s best to start light with multiple gold chains + italian horn or the wifebeater + italian horn. These simple but effective combos are just the begginning of being an unstoppable force. Generally speaking the iroc-z is the prerequisite if you want to be truly unstoppable. Sometimes I will rock the fist pump out of the t-tops of my iroc-z with the 18″ subs with house music with italian flag, multiple gold chains + italian horn and to round it off with style the wifebeater… That combo took me from the mayor of hylan blvd to the president of 86th street. I would have headlined the 18th ave feast but I was too busy getting the duece together.
The combos are limitless and a master never tells all his secrets… Feel free to create your own combos drop me a line and see how you fare, but I must warn you with upper level combos such as the ones above I take no responsibility for the aftermath.
RSS
UMMMM yeah…so I wonder how it feels to have such a tiny penis?
Ahh…. The Guido fist pump is back, good to know. If I didn’t know better this profile almost sounds like a commercial for a new 18” hoagie sandwich at some Italian deli. Now I’m hungry.
Aaaaaaaaalrighty, then…(?)
Hook. Me. Up.
Sounds like he’s describing Christopher from The Sopranos.
ahh the wonders of self advertisement. I love the space & It’s reality altering powers.
Although I must commend this guy on his tenacity for keeping the Iroc-Z alive, now if he just could handle the sheer awesomeness of the “Mexican Mullet” he would be solid.
p.s. “the space” is blocked @ work so If someone could post a picture of what this man looks like that would be dreamy. I want to print it out and distribute this on the cubicle walls @ work.
Must be some mook who talks “wit tree fingers.”
Ron:
Actually I’ve heard that Italians are quite well endowed. Though I can’t confirm that. (I think there was a survey published last year.)
Jimbo:
See Ron? 18″!
TC:
Dude’s got some serious combos. They’d do damage in any side scrolling fighter scenario.
Cinders:
I suspect you’re not the only lady who’s intrigued.
Marie B.:
So true. Moltisanti’s the shiznit.
Mulk:
You got it. From his “pics” page:
Marc:
Or a guy with a fantastic sense of humor. I’m not 100% sure.
gotta respect this guy..
pretty sure he’s joking (i hope i hope i hope)
JJ - My partner is Italian and yes I can confirm that.
But this guy? LOL
No way this guy is serious. NO WAY.
To my shame, I used to have a boyfriend back in the 80s who had an Iroc with t-tops. He didn’t wear wife beaters or do the fist pump thing, but he still bagged me just with the car. The sad thing is…i was even hot. Bah. f’ing power of an iroc.
Mmmmmm ….. O.K……….
So what kind of defense do you use against a rapid fire guido fist pump?
damn, the damn websense blocks the entire thing. I’ll check it out from a cyber cafe. Seriously thought I appreciate the effort.
make mine Zod in 2008!!!
I have no idea what all that meant. But that Tony Soprano wannabe in the pic? That’s hot.
Antickpix:
Me too.
Ron:
Nice!
C.Ro:
Thank you. I’m with you on this one.
Trouble:
Time for me to admit… I used to drive an ‘86 metallic yellow Firebird.
Turboslut:
You’re not into the rapid fire guido fist pump?
Lyndon:
I think you gotta go with the Iroc-Z or at least the multiple gold chains.
Mulk:
I’m a little hurt that Websense blocked MySpace but didn’t block The Churning. Those fuckers.
Thao:
He does have sort of a Tony Soprano sort of thing going on. Good call.