The Churning
26Jun/0624

Shave Everywhere: Dick, Balls and Ass

I know The Churning has discussed shaved nutsacks and vaginal hairstyles before, but the Shave Everywhere ad campaign takes it to a whole new smoothly cropped level. We're talking bald assholes, shorn cock-shafts, and silky smooth ballbags.

God damn, that is the gayest thing I've ever written.

  • Share/Bookmark
Comments (24) Trackbacks (1)
  1. Naw, the humidity is too high, so I’ll pass on having a sweaty nutsack.

  2. The first day or so after I quite enjoy it. It’s that itchy feeling when it grows back in that I hate.

  3. “At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum… it’s breathtaking- I highly suggest you try it.”

  4. I wouldn’t even attempt to shave my cock shaft. If you must have the hair off of your cornhole, twigs, and berries I think waxing would be a better alternitive.

  5. try WAXING it all.. that’s when you know you’re truly a man!!!

  6. Soviet, it doesn’t even itch that much after doing it for a while.
    Jimbo, after a couple of times you don’t even think about it.
    Waxing would be WAY too painful LC. I’m perfectly happy keeping it all shaved.

  7. PS- Is there a method to your madness following up Hitler Cats with shaved scrotums, JJ?

  8. MacBros:
    Hair or no hair, ball sweat is horrendous.

    Soviet:
    Looks like Marc has offered some advice. I concur.

    Ron:
    In the spring we’d make meat helmets

    Jimbo:
    See Marc’s comment.

    LC:
    Waxing that area seems dangerous… even more dangerous than a straight razor.

    Marc:
    Hmmm… Maybe subconsciously.

  9. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. Guys who shave their balls are the only way to go.

  10. the fact that this is a REAL ad campaign is what really gets me.

    i could go on about the necessity of shaving various bits if you want quality girls to touch them, but this is a family blog, right?

  11. Uhm..what the fuck happened to men and women?

    That hair grows there for a reason, I don’t know what it is, but it is there for a reason.

    Only wanting guys/girls who shave down there is fucking retarded. That’s like saying you want to fuck prepubescent teens.

    Fuck that shit, yo. There is nothing wrong with bush. The hair, not the president.

  12. Eddie:
    For those of who who aren’t aware – Eddie is a girl. A girl who appreciates a nice smooth ballsack.

    Sarah:
    Yeah, No kidding. And it’s not some small niche company. It’s Nor-fucking-elco!

    Ev:
    Don’t give me that bullshit. What about ladies’ legs, and armpits, and upper lips, and unibrows? Some areas of the body can be shaved for aesthetics. And that’s called personal fucking pride (or vanity I guess).

    Don’t get me wrong. Having a fetish for sloppy looking hairy snatches is cool. But having a fetish for clean, bald snatches is equally valid.

  13. Oh.. and I heard a cool euphemism today on the Opie and Anthony show. Another term for a woman with a hairy snatch and big vag lips: “Fidel Castro eating a roast beef sandwich.”

  14. I’m just sayin’…what is so wrong with some pubes? Seriously.

  15. There’s nothing wrong with some pubes. Pubes are healthy and natural. But here’s the deal:

    If you’re a young sexually active adult, it might help to pay a little attention to personal grooming. You’ll get a lot more repeat customers if you don’t have an unkempt mangled mess down below.

    Like let’s say you’re a woman and you’re trying to meet/date/hook up with guys. You should definitely shave your pussy lips. Sure, you could leave a little on top, but even so, it’s gotta be trimmed up real nice. I suspect you’ll get a lot more oral action if it’s cleaned up down there. My advice to the ladies would be to go for the wood floor or the landing strip.

    For the dudes, the manliest way to deal with the pubes is to shave the balls and trim the rest. Cut it to like 1/2 to 1 inch. Or if you’re totally self confident and sexually aware – of course you could shave it all (which I’m sure some women prefer for their dudes).

  16. I’ve actually been thinking about getting that Norelco Bodygroom just for this purpose… The few times I’ve gotten clippers near my balls I ended up bleeding. So if that puppy is really shaft, beanbag, and starfish safe I think I’m going to give it a “whirl”.

  17. A couple months ago, my wife told me she did not like the hair down there – more oral pleasure would be the result if the hair disappeared. Seven point three minutes later I was shaved bald. Magically, I gained an inch of male enhancement without the pills sold at late night and it looked very pornstarish. The hair growing back was an annoyance – It was hard to keep up shaving without causing nicks and cuts.

    Well, I took the plunge and did the waxing – a full Brazilian. Slight ouch, but it was not too bad. There were a few moments that I was ready to hit the girl that did it (yes, a 23 year old hottie. She actually had 10 years of experience waxing – her mom owned the spa.) Generally, it was a 5 second pain, but did not last.

    I was surprised by her attention to detail – I did not do all my research. Everything was not only gone in the front, but she also insisted that she put me on my hands and knees to get the backside. Definitely one of my gayer moments.

    Anyway, I have had my second wax. It did not hurt nearly as much or require much maintenance. I was told by my third or fourth time, little hair would come back.

    Bottom line, my wife has become much more enthusiastic about mouth love. Three months ago I would have said waxing was stupid for men – now I would recommend it before shaving

  18. ArchiBald:
    Excellent advice. Women really do seem to love the “clean” look.

  19. I shaved my area the other night. Not entirely, but shortened it to 3/8 of an inch. My girlfriend went fucking NUTS! No pun intended. She loved it, and I loved what she did to me because she loved it. So I don’t think it was too bad, overall. It does itch, though.

  20. I will never shave my balls ever in my life

  21. That’s just silly.

  22. I love to shave my pubs as it increses sensation & my gf like a clean cock to fuck her. So try it.

  23. Shaving helps to get a great pleasure while fucking a pussy & ass. It helps in easy entry & exit during fucking a girl.

  24. i can see some of these guys dont have many girls in there life.. its great to look neat and clean.. the ladies love it..


Leave a comment


CommentLuv Enabled

Subscribe via Email

Register to receive an email every time there's a new post on The Churning.


Preview

Feedback

Recent Posts

Recent Comments

Blogs

Friends

Partners

Users Online