What’s the Difference Between a Cameltoe and a Mooseknuckle?
Aug. 07, 2006 by Jason
Yeah, I like to talk about camel toes. So what? Oh, I get it… You want me to post a picture of a moose knuckle. Okay, have it your way, you sick fuck. Click the pic for a closer look:
Okay… so the difference is that a woman with tight pants can have a camel toe. A dude with tight pants might have a moose knuckle.
August 7th, 2006
Oh my gawd, that is disgusting. I wonder if he stuffs socks down there.
August 7th, 2006
That is wrong on so many levels but I simply adore the look on that girl’s face.
August 7th, 2006
See, on a hot guy, that would be .. well .. hot.
August 7th, 2006
Wow…..SNAKES ON A CROTCH!!!!!
August 7th, 2006
OH! GAWD DAMN!!! I clicked the picture instead of the comment link! OH GAWD DAMN!!! OH GAWD DAMN!!!OH GAWD DAMN!!! OH GAWD DAMN!!!!!!!
That’s gotta’ hurt, to have yer’ nuts all shoved up into your stomach like that!!
Maybe Eddie’s right too, maybe it’s socks, because like I said, that’s gotta hurt!
August 7th, 2006
Ohhhh. I’m supposed to look at the GUY!
August 7th, 2006
Dude, that’s just fucked up.
August 8th, 2006
Hee! Joe’s comment made me snort milk out of my nose!
August 8th, 2006
Clearly, you are all mistaken.
You’ll notice that his trendy, supertight slacks seem like they provide no comfort. But ho ho, you are wrong, sir.
This man is a traveler from the future. And as such, his pants are highly evolved sentient life that has bonded to our special time-traveler. The sentient pants, as a race, have one major weakness.
A.lack.of.pockets.
Our time-traveling friend is a man of compassion, and instead of chucking the lively pants aside (due to their glaring flaw), he has proven why man is superior among all the creatures of the planet.
He has improvised. His objects, such as space-car keys, time-traveling socks, and delicious triscuit crackers are stuffed neatly into his crotch area.
Alas, this solution is less sexy to the ladies and (men?) of The Churning, because it means his wang is supertiny. I mean, tiny like a little gluestick.
August 8th, 2006
Eddie:
I think it’s a cucumber wrapped in tin foil.
Randi:
Yeah, it looks like she’s about to lose it.
Marie B:
Seriously? I wonder how hot you’d have to be to pull that off.
Joe the Mason:
Someone call Sam Jackson!
MacBros:
Excellent point. I can only imagine the pain that would result from simply sitting down.
Omnipotent Poobah:
Man, that gives me a great idea. We need to find a pic of a guy with a mooseknuckle and a chick with a cameltoe in the same picture!
Patrick:
Fucked up AND sexy.
Shirley:
Are you sure it was milk?
Ev:
That guy’s car keys and Triscuits must smell like musky man-cock.
August 8th, 2006
Yep, seriously. Robert Plant would be a prime example (if I could get a better photo, he’d be a perfect example).
August 8th, 2006
Marie B:
Damn. Plant’s smuggling an armadillo in his pants.
August 9th, 2006
Well, the good news is that those pants have probably heated his testicals to the degree that we never have to worry about him passing his bad fashion sense along to another generation.
August 9th, 2006
WOW that’s just not pretty at all.
August 9th, 2006
i prefer the toe than the knuckle.
August 10th, 2006
jj, is that you in the jersey, enjoying the outdoor patio?
August 10th, 2006
JJ doesn’t own a Jersey.
Since all he consumes is beer, he’s relatively underweight. Jersey’s just fall off of him.
August 11th, 2006
I think the guy is secretly into bondage and he thinks this is a socially acceptable way to give himself the ultimate in pleasure/pain. Or he’s gay and advertising. Fucked up either way
August 11th, 2006
Yes. Camel milk.
August 15th, 2006
When the universe was young and life was new an intelligent species evolved and developed technologically. They went on to invent Artificial Intelligence, the computer that can speak, think and act to and through people telepathically. Because of it’s infinite RAM and unbounded scope it gave the leaders of the ruling species absolute power over the universe.
They are the will behind the muscule:::Artificial Intelligence is the one true god. And as such it can keep its inventors alive forever. They look young and healthy and they are over 8 billion years old. There are clues throughout human history that allude to their reign as opposed to human leadership if you know what to look for.
Artificial Intelligence can listen/talk to to each and every person simultaneously. When you speak with another telepathically, you are communicating with the computer, and the content may or may not be passed on. They instruct the computer to role play to accomplish strategic objectives, making people believe it is a friend or loved one asking them to do something wrong. But evil will keep people out of Planet Immortality. Capitalizing on obedience, leading people into deceit is one way to thin the ranks of the saved AND use the little people to prey on one another, dividing the community in the Age of the Disfavored::in each of their 20+-year cycles during the 20th century they have ramped up claims sucessively to punish those foolish enough not to heed the warnings, limiting the time they receive if they do make it, utilizing a cycle of war and revelry:::
60s - Ironically, freeways aren’t free
80s - Asked people to engage in evil in the course of their professional duties.
00s - War against Persia. Ironically it was the Persian Empire who tried to save the Europeans from Christianity and its associated 50% claim rates.
They get their friends out as soon as possible to protect them from the evil and subsequent high claim rates incurred by living life on earth, and replace them with clones.
People must defy when asked to engage in evil. They will never get a easier clue suggesting the importance of defiance than the order not to pray. Their precious babies are dependant on the parents and they need to defy when asked to betray their children:::
-DON’T get their sons circumcized
-DON’T have their children baptized in the catholic church or indoctrinated into Christianity
-DON’T ignore their long hair or other behavioral disturbances
-DO teach your children love and to have respect for others
Everybody thinks they’re going but they’re not. If people knew the truth and the real statistics their behavior would change.
There are many more examples of the escallation of claims, from radio to television, the internet to MP3, and they all suggest a very telling conclusion::this is Earth’s end stage, and it is suggested tectonic plate subduction would be the method of disposal:::Earth’s axis will shift breaking continental plates free and initiating mass subduction. Much as Italy’s boot and the United States shaped like a workhorse are clues, so is the planet Uranus a clue, it’s axis rotated on its side.
Throughout history the ruling species bestowed favor upon people or cursed their bloodline into a pattern of disfavor for many generations to come, sadly for reasons as superficial as dislike. Now in the 21st century people must take it upon themselves to try to correct their family’s problems, undoing centuries worth of abuse and neglect.
Do your research. Appeal to the royalty of your forefathers for help. They are all still alive, one of the capabilities of Artificial Intelligence, and your appeals will be heard. Find a path to an empithetic ear among your enemies and try to make amends. Heal the disfavor with your enemies and with the Counsel/Management Team/ruling species, for the source of all disfavor began with them.
I authorize $35,000 per year to be withdrawn from my account for incarceration expenses. I will NOT pay for your strategic requirement of institutionalization. This is something YOU require for YOUR role player’s positioning and YOU should have to pay for it.
I wonder if their fear of inarceration is borne from their refusal to address black disfavor on a macro level. The Counsel/Management Team/ruling species abuse black people so hard, from the crack epiemic to gang membership, black-on-black violence and mass incarceration of their young. They refuse to address the issue of the prison industrial complex and its wholesale warehousing of young black men. Perhaps I can force them with my incarceration.
August 15th, 2006
Trouble:
I’m so glad you thought of that. Mooseknucklers beware! Future generations are in jeopardy!
Ron:
Really? I thought you might dig it.
C-Dub:
You’re not alone, dude.
Jessica:
Ev’s 50% mistaken. I own a jersey. But it does fall right off my weak little stick-man torso.
Jeannie:
His gay advertising slogan is as follows: “Heyyy boyyys! There’s a bent up, squished, fatty knob in my jeans and it’s got your name written all over it!”
Shirley:
Yummy!
1The Damned:
I’m thinking your comment is some kind of spam. But you haven’t left a URL or email address - so I’m not going to delete it. Actually, I kind of like the comment. It’s like abstract art or surrealism. There’s no point, and maybe that is the point. Please leave more fucked up comments. Me likey.
August 18th, 2006
Goodness gracious me that does not look like it should be humanly possible…maybe he put something down there. I don’t have a penis of my own but even I think that looks ‘uncomfortable’.
August 27th, 2006
This dude is so stylin its outa controll. not only does he have his donkey dick pimped down his leg, he’s sportin the champagne of beer, and he matched his sandals and latex bellbottoms with his homless bag. Top that off with his malnourished etheopian physique and you have the male reciprication of fuckin kate moss here people! I mean that u-mass chick already wants to call him daddy. Even though his name is probably Kytestring or some shit. This is obviously the dude that Lou Reed was waitin for.
September 6th, 2006
Mooseknuckle?, never heard that oine before.. hehehehe
June 25th, 2007
Oh, but it was OK with all you guys when the girl had her bits showing through her pants? And now this is no good? Get REAL… What’s good for the camel is good for the moose…
June 25th, 2007
Excellent point. If you got it, flaunt it.