Listen, I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but just a few years ago, no one knew about blogs or ‘bloggin’. When I started my site (on blogger in the beta stages of what has now become the true bane of my very soul), it was about entertaining my friends. My buds, who were just as bored at work as I was, joined me. We wrote to make each other laugh. I never really gave a fuck what readers (that’s you) cared or thought. We had a solid run. We started gaining readership and readers, who we abused regularly. We bought a domain, got new hosting software, and basically invented the “blogreview” (We nothing, it was all Maine.)

And things were good. We had 5 authors at our prime. 5 of my best friends. And they made me laugh daily, and in Elwood/Jason’s (not JJ, for the uninitiated) case, sometimes 50 times a day. Man, that guy posted a lot. Eventually, we had to stop doing the QW! site. Basically, someone lost a job over it, and was then threatened to be blackballed by certain government organizations. So, when we quit, some of us branched into other sites.

Fast forward a few years. Now, it seems that everyone and their brother (including fucking characters from tv shows) have a blog. I imagine these individuals rushing home to blog their thoughts (which are, at most times, neither interesting nor entertaining), and show the world “just how special I am”. I imagine them with smug little looks on their face as they spout out their “Mundane Ramblings On the Edge of Reality from a Crazy Girl/Guy On a Quest to Find Himself/Herself”. (Did I miss any shitty blog titles? Come the fuck on, people) I imagine them fastidiously clicking the “Get Mail” button to see if anyone commented on their funny post about how people in the coffee line are really dumb and how Sheila, the bitch at the office, pissed off the wrong person today! I imagine all of this with clarity, constantly reminding myself that the world is full of fucking retarded, trite, ignorant, callous and decidedly petty people. Am I dismayed at this revelation? Not quite. Do I liken the blogging world to an adult High School? Fucking Absolutely.

Which brings me to today, on one hand, I can name at least 8 ‘die-hard’ bloggers who have ‘quit’ blogging. Usually with some dramatic statement, indicating just how profound they really were. It is these people, who have renewed my dream of the End of Days. Am I a dick? Absolutely. But are you not entertained? Wait, let me put on my gladiator’s costume and scream that, “ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?!?!?!!?”

The thing I love about guys like JJ or Maine (from that QWMaine site) is that while they put a lot of effort into their “Insane Ponderings of A Girl in the City”, they take it with a grain of salt. They’re self-deprecating, and aware that their blog is just as stupid as any other, and not some Tome of Lore that will be mulled over by Bambridge Scholars.

But you see, that’s what seperates the cream from the whey, as it were. These guys are truly like that. When we get together, we might talk about some existential theory on the true meaning of life (thanks, MaryJane!), but at the end of the day we know we’re abso-fucking-lutely retarded and no one cares about what we think. Does it stop us from being ourselves? No. But we’re not going to be winning any Nobel Peace Prizes anytime soon, either.

“So, Ev”, you blithely ask, “What’s your fucking point?” My point is merely this: No one cares about you, your life, or your blog. The only readers you ever really had, were most likely friends of yours (or friends of friends). Anyone else, just came to your site to get traffic, or spam ads for penis enlargement, free prescription medications, or games of Texas Hold’em. To quote Tyler Durden: “You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake. You are the same decaying matter as everything else. You are the all singing, all dancing crap of the world.” Get the fuck over yourself.

Incidently, if you now hate me and want to tell me off, please feel free to do so. Just don’t be surprised if I don’t care.

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