The Churning is Fucked Up and Fake
Mar. 08, 2007 by Jason
This website is so fucked up and fake. I write like I have balls and don’t give a shit what people think. But in reality, I’m just a fucked up douche like everyone else.
I always worry about what people think of me. Always. I am completely incapable of being an unapologetic asshole. Herein lies the problem…
I am an asshole. I just can’t be honest about it. If people only knew what I really thought of them. Sure, I have a lot of true friends whom I think very highly of. But then there are the rest of you fuckers. The people who could die and I would smile quietly. There are people in my life who I acknowledge - maybe I smile and wave - but inside I’m silently judging them.
If you’re reading this and you’re wondering where you fit in my silly little brain, here’s an easy way to figure it out: If I hang out with you on a regular basis, I respect you and count you as a friend. If I ignore your emails and only see you when we happen to bump into each other, I probably hate you.
Sorry I can’t just be open and honest about it. You’ll have to figure it out for yourself.
_____________________________
March 8th, 2007
I have always secretly know that you hated me. And I have secretly hated you in secret.
Does that make me as fucked up as The churning?
Also….
I heard you like to eat philly steaks off of your own ass. That’s goddamned disgusting!
March 8th, 2007
Ev:
I didn’t know that was a secret…
All:
I just posted this thing a couple hours ago and three people have already called me to find out what made me so angry.
I’m not angry. This post was sparked by a completely insignificant event. I just wanted to point out that I am entirely preoccupied with what other people think of me - to the point that I’m just not honest with people.
But again, if I talk to you on a regular basis, this post is not about you.
March 8th, 2007
I think the fact that three people just called you to find out if you’re pissed at them speaks to the fact that we’re all pretty much fucked up in the same ways.
I dated an unapologetic asshole for a while. It was rough. I found I didn’t really want to know what someone was always thinking. Unbridled honesty is a real pain in the ass. My mom used to tell me that if I didn’t have anything nice to say, to keep my g/d mouth shut. Not bad advice, really.
We’re all assholes. We all do this shit. In the privacy of my car, I feel free to critique other drivers, loudly; make comments about how funny-looking people are; and mock people’s disgusting habits (when they mistakenly believe they are alone instead of surrounded by clear glass windows). But for the most part, I don’t voice my opinions of people out loud. Most people can’t handle the truth.
March 8th, 2007
dammit.
March 8th, 2007
….scared to comment here now.
March 8th, 2007
You had me at asshole…
March 9th, 2007
ROFL!! I kinda figured you were an asshole, but that’s why I always enjoy popping in here to see what kind of a jerk you’re being.
See man, I’m an asshole to everybody, I’m not pregidous.
Wow! Never thought I would use the words, “Asshole, popping in, jerk, and see man” all in one comment.
Think what you will, but it’s just a coincidence. Honest!
But this is just my opinion, and you’re entitled to it.
March 9th, 2007
Quote from Trouble: “My mom used to tell me that if I didn’t have anything nice to say, to keep my g/d mouth shut. Not bad advice, really.”
Didn’t your mom used to tell you the same thing?
March 9th, 2007
trouble:
Yeah, you can’t be 100% honest all the time. There’s definitely a time and place for it. I guess I just wish my “real” personality was just a tiny bit more like my “online” personality.
sarah:
Yeah.
Yogo:
Don’t worry. This post is really just a lot of exaggeration piled up in one place to make a point. I do feel a bit better now.
Mr. Fabulous:
I knew I would.
MacBros:
That’s a gay coincidence. I didn’t even know coincidences could be gay. I assumed they were asexual.
Martha:
Yeah. Honestly, I don’t know the answer. It’s not healthy to keep things bottled up - or to keep all of your opinions silent and secret. But of course it’s horrible to be the kind of person who doesn’t care what other people think - and to tell them to their face. There’s got to be a middle ground. I just have to find it.
March 9th, 2007
But myspace friends are forever, right??
March 9th, 2007
cinders:
I hate to admit this, but you really are on to something here. I would never accept a friend request from someone I secretly didn’t like. Maybe MySpace is my little way of being honest with people. Hahaha.
March 9th, 2007
I check in randomly because you’re as delinquent as I am about posting. But to be honest, this sudden out-pouring of feelings makes me want to do the same, and so, I will:
I hate you too JJ.
Now that that’s settled, I hope your band is doing well.
March 9th, 2007
it probably was the tv gig that made you that way… because you know those people that you smile and wave at are most likely the same type of little fuckers who would call your ass up at the tv station to complain about their kids getting taken away and that you should run a story looking into that… all the while listening to their sappy embellishment of their side of things, your mouth turns a crimson red from the biting of your tounge because you really just want to tell them “look bitch, maybe if you’d stop feeding your children crack, they’d still be with you and they wouldn’t be as mentally retarded as you are being right now.” but instead you politely take their name, number, and say you will *try* to get a reporter to call their sorry ass back… is it something like that? no? well maybe that’s just me then…
March 10th, 2007
Damn, the mystique is gone.
March 10th, 2007
Dear JJ,STOP
Just checking in…STOP
Are you still emo and dumb?STOP
LOL,JK BFF!STOP
ALSO,STOP
I HATE YOU.STOP
HA HA HASTOP
EVSTOP
FUSTOP
LOLSTOP
March 10th, 2007
i like unapologetic assholes better, anyway. there’s less bullshit this way.
March 10th, 2007
OK well then where do I fit? You do answer my emails and sometimes you email me. But yet we’ve never met. By the way, it’s OK if you hate me, I love me some angry sex! (OOPS I hope I didn’t just say that outloud just now)
But seriously? I know I’m an asshole too. Welcome to the club!
March 18th, 2007
LMAO All I can think of right now is that line from “Road House” where the waitress is telling Dalton about one of the bartenders and it goes something like, “Don’t mind him, he was born an asshole and just grew bigger.” I guess the fact that I can remember lines from that movie make me a sort of asshole too- Actually it’s something I hear from my husband quite a bit. He doesn’t use the bitch word often but he calls me an asshole all the time.
March 25th, 2007
[...] Mar 25th, 2007 by yogo I think JJ still hates me. Why does he hate me? I don’t know. And what can you do about haters? Nothing. Maybe I’ll go to Philly and punch him in the face. [...]