Facebook is for old people

TIME magazine ran an article called Why Facebook is for Old Fogies. It grabbed my attention because a lot of my 30-something peers still avoid Facebook, thinking it's strictly for people in their teens or early 20's (people who are either in school or recently graduated). Not even close. Moms and dads are on there. What college kid wants to be on a social networking site with their parents? You wouldn't want your dad to see pictures of you drinking underage with a group of degenerates he's never even heard of. And you certainly wouldn't want to post status updates about the hot sex you had last night or how drunk you got.

So what's left? Old people. People who have good intentions and nothing to hide. Booooriiiing. Actually I'm only guessing. I wouldn't really know if young people think it's boring. I'm 33. And in a teenager's eyes, that means I've got one foot in the grave. Here's a rundown of a few points from that TIME article with my comments added (why do they have their logo in all caps anyway?).

Why Facebook Is for Old Fogies

1. Facebook is about finding people you've lost track of.
   Young people haven't lost track of anyone. They haven't lived long enough yet.
2. We're no longer bitter about high school.
   This is part of that whole being old and boring thing.
3. We never get drunk at parties and get photographed holding beer bottles in suggestive positions.
   I honestly think this is the number one fear for old people. They're shy. They don't want people to see pictures of them doing crazy things. What they don't realize is they don't do crazy things. They're old and lame.
4. We're lazy.
   Facebook is easy. You just upload a photo, fill in a few text boxes, and post a status update. Easy. MySpace is a nightmare with all the flashing animated ads and music players and obnoxious html profiles. Old people don't have the time or energy for that bullshit. That's why MySpace belongs to young people.
5. We're not cool, and we don't care.
   I don't really think old people are apathetic about not being cool. They just can't do anything about it. The only 30-somethings who are cool are rock stars, professional athletes, and movie stars (prostitutes and drug dealers are cool too but in a different way).

I'm not saying you should join Facebook. I really don't give a shit. But don't avoid it because you're old. If you're old, you probably belong there.