Reverse Keyword Search

Whenever I come up with an idea for an invention or a new online tool, inevitably I find out my idea already exists. Someone else always beats me to it.

Last month, I thought - It's a pain in the ass to remember my username and password for every website I've ever joined. I got into the habit of storing them locally on a spreadsheet, but even that is cumbersome. It would be so much easier if they were all accessible through one website, a sort of central portal: links to my favorite online stores, banking, message boards, etc along with my various usernames and passwords. Then I did a little digging. And of course it already exists. Passpack. Check it out if you're interested.

This month I was onto something different. It's geared towards webmasters. If you run a website and you want to know where you rank for a certain search term, all you have to do is Google it. But what if you want to know where you rank for a bunch of different search strings?

In 2005 when I started this site, I'd Google The Churning periodically to see where I ranked, and each time I'd see my rank increase due to my SEO efforts. Then I began to notice people were arriving at my site with all kinds of weird search terms. I could Google those search strings one by one to see where I ranked for each. But yesterday I thought - Wouldn't it be great if there were a way to find out every search string that had me listed as the top result? I wanted to create a reverse keyword search. And as usual - it's already out there. And it's fucking awesome. SEODigger.

After you register at the site, type in your web address and select "Full search for domain name". You can run 10 searches every hour (restricting this helps reduce the number of concurrent searches, allowing the results to load faster). The results are typically outdated by about two weeks, so while it is a very useful tool, your actual ranking might be slightly different. Regardless, what I discovered was fantastic.

Out of every website on the fucking planet, Google thinks I'm the number one resource for albino porn. And that's good because it's sorta true. I have never personally posted or linked directly to albino porn, but I did write a post on the subject. And what I found is that albino porn really does exist. You just have to sift through the comments on my post to find it.

So this got me thinking... What search strings rank high for my online pals? I ran a few SEO digs and discovered:

• Eddie Speaks Whale ranks #1 for rip whacker
• MacBros’ Place is at the top of the list for hip waiter and tad hilgenbrink nude
• The gang over at The Airing of Grievances are apparently experts on ass man fuck
• The Finest Kind of Pork revels in its undistinguishedness
• The Omnipotent Poobah knows a lot about gas randomness
• And Randi's Random Rantings apparently has a lot to offer when it comes to mammories milky

So tell me - What search terms put you in the top 20?

Google Forgot About Me

I used to get a ton of hits from Google searches. People found this site while searching for things like hung like a horse, Prothro injury pic, cock blog, taking a shit, etc. Yes they're strange search strings, but at least they led potential new readers to The Churning.

Then a couple of days ago, Google stopped sending people in our direction. I don't know what happened. It's like I've fallen off the face of the internet. I did a little digging around and was baffled.

This page used to be ranked number one when searching for The Churning. But now it's buried beneath hundreds of other results. I think it's safe to say that my site should be number one for that string, considering that's the title and 137 other sites link to this page.

I tried a few other searches that used to give me hits and got similar results. Searching for Jack E Brown dancing, Napoleon Dynamite Utah State Fair, or The Rawker no longer leads you to this site. Now I'm starting to feel a little paranoid.

I know the page is still listed, because it shows up when you search for "The Churning" or "www.thechurning.com." My only thought is that Google may think I've cheated. I do link to myself a lot, in the sidebar and within posts that reference older posts. Maybe I've been banned.

Any ideas?